The Evil Santa Competition Winner ... won't be me
Despite best intentions, this year has been a total failure.
Not one glistening tear on the face of a single child, not one Santa-related existential crisis.
Yep: No points. Null Punkte. Nil Points. (Much as the UK will get at the Eurovision Song contenst this year, because of Cameron's EU veto)
I blame the computer games, and the general air of Pyrrhonian cynicism in the under 3s. Not even my trusty "I beat Rudolph with a pain stick until he jumped into my pie making microwave" line worked.
Actually, speaking of Rudolph, has anyone here ever heard of "Rudolph" Bultmann before?
No. Me neither.
But apparently Amazon are publishing his books, including Jesus Christ and Mythology, Primitive Christianity, and a two-volume Theology of the New Testament.
Must be a plagiarising relative of the famous Rudolf Bultmann.
And while on cool names, beat this one: Associate Professor in Language and Literacy, Society and Culture at the University of Berkeley, is none other than ... Zeus Leonardo
I know, right, awesomeness itself. Virtually Odin-esque