Wednesday, October 15, 2008

CTRVHM Pastoral Advice

Listen to the problem case for a bit (call them that, too. E.g. "You must be Problem Case X13/12.3"), avoid eye contact (cf. bible references on the ‘evil eye’), and look bored. Then say:

  1. Repent more, or
  2. pray more, or
  3. read the bible more, or
  4. fast more, or
  5. bind and loose more, or
  6. tithe much more, or
  7. all of the above. And more."

If, after a week, they claim that none of that works suggest they take the ‘more’ more seriously and that 7 is a perfect number so the fault must be theirs.

If they still say they are in a fix, throw your hands up in the air (still avoiding eye contact) and listen to the simply beautiful Goldfrapp track, ‘Clowns’ (that link being the real point of this otherwise pointless post).



At 10/15/2008 2:34 AM, Anonymous Angie Van De Merwe said...

I didn't get to listen to the song, but what you have said is true, so true. It is always a matter of "enough faith"...and then God will reward is as if faith is magic...and the magic doesn't have to be on their side for they have the power base on their side...

At 10/16/2008 9:42 AM, Anonymous David said...

I wonder why your pastoral advice seems to work so little for yourself. Remember all the long nights that I have spent rebuking you in tears and love and patience? Remember all our intense bind-and-loose-sessions?
But you just keep spreading heresy all over the web.
Anyway, I am more than sure you will be a great pastor!

At 10/16/2008 1:39 PM, Anonymous persiancross said...


I know that some of the stuff we hear in the churches all the time might be insufficient and sometimes wrong exegeticaly but I did not undrestand why you and people like me are always magnifying the flaws and problems and when someone read this things do you think that is constructive?would not be better instead of bellyaching and make fun of preachers and churches and in broader picture evangelicalism and in sharper point charismatics post something empathetic,condoning and encouraging?
Do we have capacity of criticism or we want only to criticise others?

At 10/17/2008 12:34 AM, Anonymous Chris Tilling said...

Dave, how can I forget those happy days of binding and loosing!!! Great to hear from you, my friend!

Persiancross, why do you think I am attacking anyone, magnifiyng anyone's flaws?


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