Wednesday, July 04, 2007

The Revocation of Independence Day

"To the citizens of the United States of America, in the light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today.

Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy"

To read the rest of this wonderful news, click here.

Liturgical prayer for July the 4th:

"God, please remove Will Smith from my head whenever I think of Independence Day, and make me bountifully generous to all biblical studies related blogs run by English people as a sign of my racial dependence and inferiority. Amen."

Happy Independence Day to my readers in the US.

9 Comments:

At 7/04/2007 7:56 PM, Anonymous Michael Westmoreland-White said...

Er, "RACIAL dependence and inferiority?" Phrases like that can set back Anglo-American relations even more than G.W.B., you know.

I would have thought that losing the empire would have chased away the British belief in racial superiority. Guess not.

As for myself, I have been promoting John F. Kennedy's call that we should adopt a Declaration of interdependence with all peoples of the earth.

 
At 7/04/2007 8:14 PM, Anonymous Doug Chaplin said...

This piece was first posted (AFAIK) back in the middle of the hanging chads saga in Florida. I don't know who first wrote it, but there were just enough phrases in it that sounded American to me to suspect some US home-grown satire. It's still well-worth a read though.

 
At 7/04/2007 8:44 PM, Anonymous Stephen said...

Oh sure, but not the slightest acknowledgement of Canada Day. That's the problem with you Brits, forever taking your colonies for granted.

 
At 7/04/2007 9:30 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jealousy...not becoming of a theologian! It's like little boys who make fun of others because they know they ain't (a great American word) got a chance living under the rule of a queen who really has nothing to do with anything except show how ridiculous the English are for allowing such massive funds be used to keep some bizarre family in a "fairy tale power".

Liturgical prayer for July 4th: "God, thank you for delivering us from the insane madness of England and it's Queen..but give us favour, (notice the spelling)and keep us humble as we continue to send our funds and lend our men and women to protect those on their side of the world. Amen."

 
At 7/05/2007 12:23 AM, Anonymous Jim said...

I sort of like your revocation. Gimme that socialized medicine and low or non existent University tuition! As it is we Americans are spending all our money on the Iraqis who would just as soon kill us as tolerate us.

 
At 7/05/2007 2:34 AM, Anonymous Michael Westmoreland-White said...

Well, I celebrated Canada Day. Of course, I also celebrated Cinco de Mayo and the Queen's birthday and Bastille Day. This American likes any excuse to barbecue and drink beer. :-)

And I thought the revocation was very funny. It's just that "racial dependence" line that raised my hackles.

 
At 7/05/2007 4:05 AM, Anonymous J. B. Hood said...

Remind me not to sacrifice my firstborn the next time the Germans or the Russians try to make you speak some godawful language, force you to mate with the manliest selection of their women so that your offspring become a superrace of warriors to rule the third world while living under a totalitarian form of government.

 
At 7/06/2007 8:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

That was worth, or is it wourth, 50 laughs, I louved it
thanks Chris.
An x-independent colounist James Gilbert

 
At 7/09/2007 12:13 AM, Anonymous Chris Tilling said...

Michael
"I would have thought that losing the empire would have chased away the British belief in racial superiority. Guess not."
Ouch! Nice comeback!

Actually, all of these comments are rather mean! Truth must hurt!

 

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