Tuesday, September 23, 2008

‘Interesting’ Quotes of the day

Found on answersingenesis.org, attempting to answer 'How Could Noah Build the Ark?'

"God most likely brought Noah two young adult sauropods (e.g., apatosaurs), rather than two full-grown sauropods"

Oddly, I didn't find an entry for 'sauropods' in von Rad's OT Theology...

"The Bible does not tell us that Noah and his sons built the Ark by themselves. Noah could have hired skilled laborers or had relatives, such as Methuselah and Lamech, help build the vessel"

... until Methuselah and Lamech cottoned on to the fact that the human living quarters only had enough beds for Noah, Noah's wife, his three sons, and the wives of his sons (cf. Gen. 7:13).

I bet that caused an row.

Indeed, is it not 'most likely' that the two young adult sauropods intervened to solve the issue?

Suitable expression.

7 Comments:

At 9/23/2008 12:28 AM, Anonymous One of Freedom said...

Wow, I didn't know Noah's last name was Flintstone. Who'd a thunk!

 
At 9/23/2008 1:20 AM, Anonymous Drew said...

Bur Herr Tilling... to be a good young earth creationist, you can't read the Bible. That would be sooo unscientific! Methinks your expectations are too high.

 
At 9/23/2008 2:43 AM, Anonymous Edward T. Babinski said...

THE GENESIS FLUB

How big do "two young sauropods"
grow in a year? How much food was needed to feed them during that period? Another ark's worth probably.

However, an ingenious creationist can invent his way out of such difficulties just by saying "they hibernated...for a year."

CREATIONIST STORY IN FULL: Pairs of fast-growing tiny young dinos trekked some unknown distance to just GET to the ark, arriving worn out and tired, and then had to say goodbye to their parents, then went to sleep for a year, and woke just as tiny as they began, parentless, famished to the bone, dying for a good meal, and were let out of the ark to roam a world where the plants had all drowned, any surviving seeds had not yet even begun to sprout (even those that had, had yet to be germinated by bees), and the land was as wasteland covered with a layer of sedimentary rock about a mile thick on average.

Personally, I think Mark Twain's points make as much rational sense as the above creationist invention:

God made all the animals in a single day; he could have swept them all away in the flood and re-created them in one day when they were again needed. Therefore it was an odd idea to save specimens of them for eleven months in the ark, whilst aware that eight persons could not feed or water them by any human possibility. If they were to be preserved by miracle, the ark was not necessary - to let them swim would have answered the purpose and been more indubitably miraculous. [Mark Twain, God of the Bible vs. God of the Present Day]

 
At 9/23/2008 3:25 AM, Anonymous Edward T. Babinski said...

MYSTERIES OF THE NOAH STORY

Ever notice that Noah was way older than any of the other patriarches when he gave birth to his male heir(s)?

For instance, Adam was merely 130 when he gave birth to Seth who was 105 when he gave birth to Enos who was 90... and so on down the list of the ages of the patriarchs when they gave birth to the next patriarch on the list:

Cainan 70
Mahalaleel 65
Jared 162
Enoch 65
Methuselah 187
Lamech was 182 when he begat Noah.

But Noah was WAY older than the other patriarchs when he begat Shem, Ham and Japheth, for Noah was "500 years old" at the time!

The way Noah stands out from among the rest of the patriarchs in this respect is obvious and brings to mind three alternative explanations:

A) Noah was blessed with the gift of chastity above and beyond what any other of the patriarch's exihibited. He waited till he was "500" to bear children. I guess Noah held back the urge to even take a wife until much later than the rest of the patriarchs did.

OR...

B) Noah got married around the same age as the other patriarchs, around age "100" (when they usually had their male heirs) but Noah used a method of BIRTH CONTROL which worked perfectly for about "400" years. Maybe the "pitch" that Noah used to keep the ark watertight had "other uses?" Maybe Noah invented the first condom? Maybe we should call them "Noahs" instead of "Trojans?"

OR...

C) Noah did get married like the rest of the patriarchs around age "100" and did start having children around that age, but for "400 years" all of his children were daughters, not male heirs. And he left them all behind during the Flood because he needed more room on the ark for tiny growing dinosaurs?

 
At 9/23/2008 12:28 PM, Anonymous matthew r malcolm said...

If I had to take sauropods somewhere with me, I'd use one of those vaccuum-able plastic bags: You just pack your sauropods, attach the vaccuum cleaner, and turn it on to suck them down to a convenient size... easy

 
At 9/23/2008 8:28 PM, Anonymous Terry said...

What you're all missing is the obvious point that Noah took sauropod eggs, male and female, onto the ark.

 
At 9/23/2008 11:54 PM, Anonymous Doug Chaplin said...

Jurassic Ark!

 

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