Monday, May 26, 2008

Thought for prayerful contemplation

In the spirit of the last post, Josephus tells us that the Essenes were so strict about Sabbath observance that they refused to relieve themselves for that whole day ('nor go to stool thereon' Jewish War 2:147). No pooping or crapping allowed until Sunday! No wonder they were always talking about 'girding up their loins'. With Sabbath approaching they would need to wrap up a real sturdy girding, and that would definitely mean: no lamb vindaloo on Friday evening.

(Plus, I bet things could get pretty violent in the Sunday morning queue for the toilet. Imagine it, a community of dozens of men all desperate for ‘the place of the hand’. John pushes Simon. Simon jump in front of Matthew. Riot breaks out. I think Hippolytos had the right idea. Of course, and now I’m waffling, if both Josephus and Hippolytos were correct, I wouldn’t like to be the community bed-sheet cleaner on Sunday morning)

8 Comments:

At 5/26/2008 11:40 PM, Anonymous Scott Bailey said...

In Canada we have a saying for when you fail miserably at something: "shit the bed."

So people say things like, "I really shit the bed on that test."

It suddenly has a whole new connotation for me.

 
At 5/27/2008 9:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha....

 
At 5/27/2008 1:15 PM, Anonymous steph said...

That proves it. They didn't reproduce because there couldn't have been any pregnant women.

 
At 5/27/2008 7:41 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

It has been said that:

In the journal Jewish History, Albert I. Baumgarten, a history professor at Bar-Ilan University in Israel, noted that the text of the scrolls decrees that latrines should be constructed outside the settlement, whereas the historian Josephus records that the Essenes did not use latrines but rather a special tool to dig a hole in the ground in a remote place when they had to defecate...


Which means that come Sunday morning, there must have been a mighty footrace to get outside the compound.

Proving the old adage, that:

the race does not always go to the swiftest, but to him who HAS to GO the fastest.

Pax,
John

 
At 5/27/2008 8:28 PM, Anonymous Peter M. Head said...

This can get serious:
http://www.jpost.com/servlet/Satellite?cid=1162378392169&pagename=JPost%2FJPArticle%2FPrinter

 
At 5/29/2008 10:58 PM, Anonymous Geoff Hudson said...

They didn't go to stool outside the home because that meant walking, and digging a hole on the Sabbath. They used a potty instead, covering their backsides of course, just in case someone like God was shining his light on them. Some of these guys didn't eat meat, but lived only on what grew on trees, like figs and nuts -rather difficult to hold. They were the original Christians or anointed ones, none other than the prophets, but obfuscated to Essenes by the Flavian editors. Why is there is more in the writings attributed to Josephus about so-called 'Essenes' than say priests? Was it because Josephus himself was a prophet, descended from prophets, and not from priests. Show me where the text that describes Josephus practicing as a priest. The so-called four philosophies are an obvious later obfuscation.

 
At 5/29/2008 11:29 PM, Anonymous Geoff Hudson said...

As for Essenes at Qumran, the writings attributed to Josephus do say they were in every city. But no doubt there were less 'Essenes' than priests in most cities. The DSS are hardly the product of 'Essenes'.

Zias and Tabor have gone very quiet about 'Essene' toilets at Qumran. Their research is a load of old cobblers. As agricultural workers, 'Essenes' probably relieved themselves in any remote place where the happened to be, when the urge came opon them, except on the Sabbath of course when they went to potty.

 
At 5/31/2008 11:43 PM, Anonymous Chris Tilling said...

"They were the original Christians or anointed ones, none other than the prophets, but obfuscated to Essenes by the Flavian editor"

Geoff??

 

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