Monday, March 27, 2006

IGod on inerrancy

I’ve been enjoying reading some critique of my inerrancy posts across blogdom today. And for those of you who will read this, please just call me Chris, not Tilling in your posts. Reading ‘Tilling’ all the time makes me feel like I’ve done something naughty (you see, my mum would always shout ‘CHRISTOPHER TILLING’ if ever I did anything wrong).

I actually look forward to responding to some of your comments sometime in the near future. My planned rejoinder, for when that happy day arrives, is, in short: I’m humble and open to critique, but am still right. Obviously.

Btw, I’m not trying to ‘personality assassinate’ here or anything, but ‘disagree with Tilling’, I think all will agree, = ‘morally corrupt’, so I’ll let you work out the rest. Apart from this, it is, of course, obvious that trying to resist the genius and brilliance of my arguments is like trying to stave of the tides of the sea with a bucket. But some have to learn the hard way I guess.

Btw, Boar’s Head people, Joel understands my intentions pretty well.

Today I came across ‘IGod’ (via Steven Harris’ blog), an open internet connection with the heavenlies. Just type in your questions and IGod answers. So, I thought I’d use the opportunity and ask him about the whole inerrancy thing, just to find out who is correct and all - you know, just to prove I’m right before I continue with my series.

Anyhows, I thought I’d start off with a bit of praise to warm up:

Me:
Oh Lord
God:
"Awesome. Enough about me, let's talk about my dress."? Oh Lord? What's your favorite movie?
Me: *stunned*
Er, Biki Car Wash 4. Is that bad?
God:
I've never seen it. I would like to see it. Yes.
Me: *feels uncomfortable with the direction of the discussion, so gets back to worship*
We praise thee
God:
By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me: *Gets worried, so tries tongues*
Ohsqwirelpeenooplosbeenybum
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me: *starts to sweat*
Kiwibananakiwibanana
God:
That input matched my default category.

After my praise time, I thought I’d get to the nitty gritty with my question:

Me:
Can I ask a question?
God:
Ask it. Ask me anything.
Me:
Is the bible without error?
God:
The Bible is a great source of wisdom, but probably not complete by itself.
Me:
So, it is not inerrant then?
God:
That's interesting. A question is not inerrant?
Me:
Hey, good point!
God:
You've got my full attention. Yes, I thought it was interesting when I heard it too.
Me:
So, I'll go back to my blog and tell everyone what you said. OK?
God:
Aha. What will you find there? Groovy.
Me:
Well, people who think the bible is inerrant.
God:
How about that. Oh those people.
Me:
Indeed! Just wondering, do you have a spare smite button for me to use on them?
God:
Indeed it is so. I don't know if I have a smite button spare for you to use.
Me:
Oh please
God:
Your polite style is very nice. Take it easy.
Me:
Just one smite button. I promise I'll only use it once.
God:
One what? Do you really mean it?
Me:
Honest guv
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
Sure I’m a poet, but I just don't know it

T’was about now that the prophetic trance/internet link was getting bored, and decided to stop. Anyway, I hope this has settled the question of inerrancy for some of you doubters once and for all.

Btw, Steven Harris asked some important questions about Calvinism and ‘limited atonement’, and received some very definite answers that should hopefully end the debates once and for all.

(Disclaimer: All characters in this dialogue were entirely fictional and any similarities with real people is totally coincidental. Plus, in case you thought I was loosing a grip on my ecumenical sensitivities, the smite-urge was only intended humorously and not meant as a real expression of bloodlust against any persons or people to who it could refer, blah blah.)

11 Comments:

At 3/28/2006 12:11 AM, Anonymous Exiled Preacher said...

Tilling,

Are you sure you are only 44% evil?

 
At 3/28/2006 2:02 AM, Anonymous Chris the less said...

i killed God by asking if he spoke German (in English cause he didn't understand the German). Oh well.

 
At 3/28/2006 4:07 AM, Anonymous joel hunter said...

1,000 pardons for the formal address. My default mode for such discussions is journalese, so everyone is Scrubb and Pole.

And keep up the 'tude: we need more Nietzschean confidence in christian dialogue. :-)

 
At 3/28/2006 11:56 AM, Anonymous Chris Tilling said...

*feels suitably and justly rebuked by Guy* :-)

Chris the less, you killed God? That wasn't a very nice thing to do.

Joel thanks for the linking over on your blog, btw - a really great discussion page. Give my greetings to the members (unless they disagreed with me of course, in which case I pull a sulky face in their direction).

 
At 3/28/2006 1:30 PM, Anonymous Kez said...

Really enjoyed the last post. laughed A LOT. The whole Biblical Inerrancy thing I find a bit yesterday to be honest. I'm not too sure how normal thinking people can read the Bible and think it is so water tight. Don't really think you need to get all sophisticated and scholarly about it. Just common sense really. Some bits contradict and some bits are a bit dodgy. Thank God for the fact he made sure most of it was top banana.

So; very much enjoyed your chat with God.

Thanks for a lot of smiles in my day.

 
At 3/28/2006 1:55 PM, Anonymous Ben Myers said...

Chris The Less: Even more shockingly, I have just discovered that God does not understand Latin either! So if he doesn't speak German, it means the Lutherans must be on the wrong track; and if he doesn't speak Latin, it means he hasn't had much to do with the Catholic Church; and he didn't seem very impressed with Chris' charismatic glossolalia either.

All this leaves only one option (and it's worse than we ever feared): God has been a good respectable Anglican all along!

 
At 3/28/2006 5:48 PM, Anonymous Chris the less said...

Chris, isn't killing God what Hegel said we all do? Yeah, yeah, everyone thinks Nietzsche said it first, but Hegel beat him by many years in Phaenomenologie des Geistes.

 
At 3/28/2006 11:35 PM, Anonymous Chris Tilling said...

Hi Kez, thanks for the visit.

Don't really think you need to get all sophisticated and scholarly about it.

Well, for my journey in faith it was an important barrier to cross, and I wanted my thoughts to be clear about it. I think it is something, actually, that many want to really think through and discuss.

Glad to have made you smile. All the best.

Ben, I’ve got to tell you were your reasoning must lead: Wright is, as an Anglican, after all, greater than Bultmann.

Chris the very much less,
I didn’t know that actually. Hegel eh? You know where he said that?

 
At 3/29/2006 12:31 AM, Anonymous Chris the less said...

Hegel said it in the Phaenomenologie des Geistes (Phenomenology of Spirit for the ones who don't speak German) paragraph 752: "It is the consciousness of the loss of all essential being in this certainty of itself, and of the loss even of this knowledge about itself--the loss of substance as well as of the Self, it is the grief which expresses itself in the hard saying that 'God is dead.'" (i am using the A.V. Miller translation). J.N. Findlay's commentary says of that paragraph: "What is to the comic consciousness a vast joke is to the Unhappy Consciousness a vast misery. Its own abstract self-consciousness is a miserable refuge, and it cries with Luther (not yet born) that 'God is dead.'" (included with the translation).

 
At 3/29/2006 2:34 AM, Anonymous Ben Myers said...

I'm glad Hegel found his way into the conversation -- and of course, the concept came to Hegel via Luther (which is praiseworthy even if God himself isn't Lutheran).

 
At 3/30/2006 1:44 AM, Anonymous Chris Tilling said...

Cheers for this Chris the less

 

Post a Comment

<< Home