IGod on inerrancy

I’ve been enjoying reading some critique of my inerrancy posts across blogdom today. And for those of you who will read this, please just call me Chris, not Tilling in your posts. Reading ‘Tilling’ all the time makes me feel like I’ve done something naughty (you see, my mum would always shout ‘CHRISTOPHER TILLING’ if ever I did anything wrong).

I actually look forward to responding to some of your comments sometime in the near future. My planned rejoinder, for when that happy day arrives, is, in short: I’m humble and open to critique, but am still right. Obviously.

Btw, I’m not trying to ‘personality assassinate’ here or anything, but ‘disagree with Tilling’, I think all will agree, = ‘morally corrupt’, so I’ll let you work out the rest. Apart from this, it is, of course, obvious that trying to resist the genius and brilliance of my arguments is like trying to stave of the tides of the sea with a bucket. But some have to learn the hard way I guess.

Btw, Boar’s Head people, Joel understands my intentions pretty well.

Today I came across ‘IGod’ (via Steven Harris’ blog), an open internet connection with the heavenlies. Just type in your questions and IGod answers. So, I thought I’d use the opportunity and ask him about the whole inerrancy thing, just to find out who is correct and all - you know, just to prove I’m right before I continue with my series.

Anyhows, I thought I’d start off with a bit of praise to warm up:

Me:
Oh Lord
God:
"Awesome. Enough about me, let's talk about my dress."? Oh Lord? What's your favorite movie?
Me: *stunned*
Er, Biki Car Wash 4. Is that bad?
God:
I've never seen it. I would like to see it. Yes.
Me: *feels uncomfortable with the direction of the discussion, so gets back to worship*
We praise thee
God:
By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me: *Gets worried, so tries tongues*
Ohsqwirelpeenooplosbeenybum
God:
Try saying that with more or less context.
Me: *starts to sweat*
Kiwibananakiwibanana
God:
That input matched my default category.

After my praise time, I thought I’d get to the nitty gritty with my question:

Me:
Can I ask a question?
God:
Ask it. Ask me anything.
Me:
Is the bible without error?
God:
The Bible is a great source of wisdom, but probably not complete by itself.
Me:
So, it is not inerrant then?
God:
That's interesting. A question is not inerrant?
Me:
Hey, good point!
God:
You've got my full attention. Yes, I thought it was interesting when I heard it too.
Me:
So, I'll go back to my blog and tell everyone what you said. OK?
God:
Aha. What will you find there? Groovy.
Me:
Well, people who think the bible is inerrant.
God:
How about that. Oh those people.
Me:
Indeed! Just wondering, do you have a spare smite button for me to use on them?
God:
Indeed it is so. I don't know if I have a smite button spare for you to use.
Me:
Oh please
God:
Your polite style is very nice. Take it easy.
Me:
Just one smite button. I promise I'll only use it once.
God:
One what? Do you really mean it?
Me:
Honest guv
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
Sure I’m a poet, but I just don't know it

T’was about now that the prophetic trance/internet link was getting bored, and decided to stop. Anyway, I hope this has settled the question of inerrancy for some of you doubters once and for all.

Btw, Steven Harris asked some important questions about Calvinism and ‘limited atonement’, and received some very definite answers that should hopefully end the debates once and for all.

(Disclaimer: All characters in this dialogue were entirely fictional and any similarities with real people is totally coincidental. Plus, in case you thought I was loosing a grip on my ecumenical sensitivities, the smite-urge was only intended humorously and not meant as a real expression of bloodlust against any persons or people to who it could refer, blah blah.)